3/24/12

Lucky Thirteen

Back in what now feels like a hundred years ago, I let someone make me feel like I wasn't worthy of love. I thought at the ripe old age of twenty-one, I was doomed to live as my grandmother and die alone and bitter. 

I fought it for a while, still wanting what I thought I deserved. After some time, it seemed inevitable and I accepted my fate in being alone. And because I believed my destiny so intensely, when a man did show interest, I missed it. It took an intervention, some creative scheduling, and a lot of determination on his part to make the pieces fit. 

On a Wednesday, thirteen years ago, I became his wife. No fancy clothes were purchased. No band played our song. We didn't have an elaborate cake to shove in each other's face. We simply walked up to the court house at our appointed time, paid a small fee, and the whole thing was over in less than thirty minutes. 

For a while, it made me sad, going to the courthouse. Not having the memories of that one day to look back on. No photographs or other mementos to dust off every so often. But a wedding isn't what makes a marriage. It's the work that two people put into it. And as I've been told all of my life, anything worth having is worth working for

One thing is for certain, we work hard. Some days we work really hard. 


Statistically, we should have divorced years ago.  The truth of the matter is that we genuinely like each other. We enjoy being together. We respect each other. And we don’t believe in 50/50. Our relationship is more 60/40, always giving more than we take.
Circa 2010

Thirteen years ago, a confirmed bachelor and potential spinster chose forever. Quite literally through the good times and bad, richer and [always] poorer, thick and thin, we have stood together, always strong. Never wavering, never considering the alternative.

I can’t believe it’s only been thirteen years. I am so lucky.   

   


8 comments:

Heather said...

Here's to another 130!

Heather said...

Thank you so much, Andrea! 

Heather said...

Congrats!

Heather said...

Beautiful post, Heather! 

Heather said...

Thank you . :) 

Heather said...

Thank you, Karen 

Heather said...

Congratulations on your 13th anniversary! My husband an I had a small wedding too, but it was just as meaningful as one that cost thousands of dollars. I wouldn't trade it for anything.
I love your 60/40 idea. It's so true! I think that if more people thought that way, marriages would last so much longer. :)

Heather said...

Thank you! I have to say, it's not entirely my idea. I was raised in that marriages were 50/50. Of course, that's not to say it is wrong, as my parents have been married 38 years. 

I saw the 60/40 ratio somewhere, and it just make sense for us. :) 

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