TXT ABBRS CN GT U LST

We went to Lowe's last night to look at fans.

I have a question about this. Used to be, stores had their display fans plugged in so folks to get a feel (pun intended) of how they worked. At one time, I never laid much value on that...I always bought the cheapest fan in the style I was looking for. However, the times oh-how-they've-changed because not all fans are created equal. (You probably already knew that.)

I learned that at Big Lots where they have their display fans plugged in.

So, back to Lowe's. We are looking for a pedestal fan. I get frustrated because, a) nothing is plugged in, and b) someone was doing some serious crop dusting, leaving me in the wake.

Without fail, all three of the men folks need to head to the rear of the store. What do they have in there anyway? The ladies room has nothing exciting to offer, so I don't feel the need to visit at every trip.

And while I am wondering things, why would a home improvement store, that carries all manner of plumbing have clogged and/or broken toilets and sinks?

I really hate standing around the entrance to the restrooms. It makes me feel like a stalker. So I tend to meander around the cabinetry and pretend that my kitchen could ever be that beautiful.

Nicholas made it out first, and we were not that far away. You know how those displays kind of maze around. Probably about ten minutes into waiting impatiently wandering aimlessly trying not to look like a stalker or shoplifter dreaming of a white kitchen, I get a message on my cell.

When I opened my phone, it said it was from Big Daddy. It read, "Marco."

Obviously, I typed back, "Polo."

Wouldn't you know that he responded with, "Marco?"

I kid you not. Texting "Marco Polo" must be the new game at the pool.

Anyway, I am standing in front of the bathrooms thinking we just keep missing each other in the rat maze without cheese of cabinet displays.

I am waiting for a few minutes to see if he responds or walks by. This guy walks up and says, "Ma'am (oh my. I am a ma'am. ::cringe::) Can I help you find something?"

I reply, "Um. I am only looking for my husband."

He sort of chuckles and starts to walk away, turns back and says, "I can have him paged."

I hold up my phone and answer, "No. We are texting 'Marco Polo'. I'll find him."

If I was the nuttiest thing he had encountered that night, I am sure that little factoid was tweeted.

Finally, I got tired of waiting and answering yet another employee that, "No thank you. I don't need any help," that I texted BD.

"We by broom."

And we waited.

And waited.

And...

I get another text, "We up front."

(Don't you love our proper grammar in our texts?)

Nicholas and I start to make our way up front. I can't really figure out how or why he is up there. But, one thought did occur to me....

"I thought you said you were by the brooms?"

I busted out laughing. "No. I said 'broom' as in 'bathroom'. Why would I be by the brooms?"

The moral of the story is, texting abbreviations can get you lost. Or not where you are supposed to be. Or frustrated by your other half. Or a funny blog post.