Last week was the week of revelations for me.
Apparently, when it comes to getting the kids ready for school in the morning, I am the only one getting up, fixing a hot breakfast, and packing lunches. I am giving up precious sleep when my little birds could be getting their own worms.
I never gave much thought to what I should be doing (or not doing) for the boys. We have slowly transitioned from some things. I don't:
- comb their hair (but, oh it kills me not to fix it the way I want)
- brush their teeth (again. yikes.)
- make sure everything is in their backpack/notebooks
- lay their clothes out (okay, we have a dress code, but still...)
- take them to the bus stop/pick up from the bus stop
- hound them about homework and check every paper (well...maybe I do this one a little)
After an informal survey in my online mom's group, I asked how they handle school mornings. While I waited for responses, I worried that in my attempt to make them independent and (eventually) self-sufficient men I was actually make them dependent. On a woman.
This can not happen.
It's not that I haven't taught them anything. Just this summer, I did teach them how to properly sort clothes and how to start the washer. They can also:
- make themselves something to eat (e.g., cereal, scrambled eggs, grilled cheese, anything microwavable, lunch meat sandwich)
- get themselves up (if they set the alarm, that is)
Jeez. Now that I look at it written down, I am not sure why I am still making breakfasts and packing lunches. I know by the time I was their age, it was my responsibility to get up and get myself to school.
I asked Nicholas what he thought about my getting up with them. His words were, "I like it. It's not that I couldn't do it. But you make eggs. I can't make eggs. I'd just mess them up."
He was totally sincere, too. A rarity for the hormonal ,unpredictable, pubescent tween.
The verdict from the mom's group was split. Some still do it all while some just oversee. So while clearly the boys are attached to the umbilical cord like my husband would like to claim 99.98% of the time, it's not like I have totally messed up.