Being a writer is not a career that you can just apply for, be hired, then start making some money. There are hundreds of thousands of people, all vying for basically the same thing. Some types of writers have less competition than others.
On one particularly rough evening of wow-is-me, I created a list. I even typed it up. And then promptly erased it for fear that someone might actually read it. At my writers group, I mentioned the list to my friend who laughed and said, "You need to write that." Since I wish I had a teaspoon of the talent CeCe has, I decided it was best to listen to her.
May I present "The Ten Things I Have A Better Chance of Than Being Published*"
1. Defeating Michelle Bachman in the primaries
2. Having a walk-on role on "Jersey Shore"
(Maybe I can talk to a certain person about her "collaborator" and get publishing tips.)
3. Running the Boston Marathon
4. Competing on "Wheel of Fortune"
5. Receiving a tweet from Ellen
6. Winning the lottery
7. Being quoted in any magazine
8. Finding Jimmy Hoffa's body
9. Getting my husband to like onions
10. Winning the Mrs. Tennessee pageant
*While I have been published in the sense that someone printed what I wrote (three times), here I mean "published" to mean a book published and for sale at a book store. Doesn't even have to be the New York Times Best Selling List.