Working at Home: It's Not All BonBons and Unicorns

Photo courtesy of Rumpleteaser

My husband and I were in the car. Totally at random I say, "I think some people resent me because I get to stay at home."

He replies, "Oh well. We make a lot of sacrifices so you can stay home."

 I've been reluctant to label myself a "stay-at-home-mom" or a "work-at-home-mom." Neither is entirely accurate as there are weeks I hardly stay-at-home. And correct me if I'm wrong, but don't all moms work? Laundry, meal planning, chauffeuring, homework overseer, etc.: it's work. But for lack of a better label, technically I am a work-at-home mom.

I think it's a common misconception that if one stays home and earns a living, it's easier. Granted, there are some advantages; however, there are days I wished I had a regular nine-to-five gig somewhere.

In  my circle of other "WAHMs", the nature of the business is feast or famine. Or maybe that's just me. Actually in my case, feast would be more accurately described as a light snack. Regardless, I have contractual obligations and people waiting (VERY! patiently) for me to finish their projects. To add more fun to my day, I also babysit a very mobile, but completely adorable eleven-month-old every day from 7:30ish to 4:00ish.

Let's look at the pros and cons:

Pro: Can work in my pajamas.
Con: [Okay, you've got me here.]

But I do get dressed daily. I actually work better if I am dressed.

Pro: I can be selective on which projects I want to take.
Con: Sometimes I have to take certain projects simply because work is slow.

Pro:  My flexible schedule means I can plan appointments, grocery shopping, and other errands.
Con:  On days I have run errands typically means a late work night.

Pro: "I bet your house stays so clean!"
Con: Uh. No. It is a bit easier than when I had a job outside the house and having an infant crawling all around keeps me on my tidy toes. Also, for every minute I am distracted with cleaning and organizing, five minutes are added to my workload.

Pro: "I'd love to sit on the couch all day!"
Con: Me too. Maybe I will one day.

Photo courtesy of Kathleen Calavaro

Five days out of seven, I am grateful, that for a while, I am able to work from home. It's been a slow go, and I haven't reached the level of success I'd like -- YET.  The hours are long even with keeping a baby during the day.



Sacrifices have been made

• The household budget is super- tight. Even more so since Big Daddy is unemployed. 
• Coupons are like money and are treated with the same reverence. 
• A vacation is unlikely any time soon. 
• And the list could go on. 

Sure, I could work outside the house. Find a position somewhere that is steady in hours and pay. Predictable. 

Perhaps the budget would ease up. (I doubt it.) We might take a small vacation. (Still unlikely) We could purchase a new(ish) vehicle to replace the recently departed. (Pipedream. See: household budget)

Knowing me, as soon as the newness of said job wore off, I'd be saying, "Wow. I miss the days when I was at home working. Even on the late nights."

The grass is always greener on the other side. And just for the record, I don't like bon-bons.




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We All Want to Believe

If ever I needed something, it is most certainly a Kick In The Blog. One of my many muses and a fabulous lady I am proud to call my friend is behind this brand spankin', squeaky clean website. Jessica posts writing prompts to help us get over that dang blinking curser.

She asks, "Who Believes in You?

Great question. I wish I had an answer.

But the truth of the matter is that I don't think anyone really believes in me. I have plenty of friends and colleagues that encourage me and give me positive feedback. As soon as I am given it, however, I start thinking, "She is just saying that because she is my friend. She wouldn't want to hurt my feelings. No one that loves you is that brutally honest."

The rational side of me wonders if no one believes in me because I don't believe in myself? Perhaps that is an irrational thought, but it is what I am thinking right now.

My husband is without a doubt my biggest fan and head cheerleader. But I feel most of the time all his rah-rah-sis-boom-bah is because is loves me. And because he is a man, he knows that poo-pooing on my ideas will inevitably cause me to poo-poo on his ideas. You know, like a clean house, clean and ironed laundry, and hot meals. Or something like that.

photo credit: Kick in the Blog

Whether his belief in my abilities are real or imaginary, he is the first one I go to when I am feeling like I am failing. At anything. Even if he doesn't understand what I am doing, he always seems to come up with the right combination of things to make me feel like I can continue to try for one more day.

Even after his little pep talks, the one thing I really want is someone to say I believe in you. And honestly mean it.


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How to Balance Life When Working from Home

Last night, I sat at the dining room table working on connecting my laptop wirelessly to the printer.

(Is wirelessly a word?)

It got to be about 9:30 or so and I realized there were no sounds coming from the living room. I had sent the boys to bed about thirty minutes prior, but I thought Big Daddy was laying on the couch reading his book.

After gathering up my laptop, all its accouterments and my cell phone, I turned off the lights, locked the doors and headed up to our bedroom where Big Daddy had apparently snuck off to.

Only, he was asleep.

As quietly as I could, I slid in the room, plugged in all my essential elements and attempted to get in my side of the bed. He woke up. I was going to work for a while so I had my laptop with me.

I say to him, "I feel neglected lately."

He looks at me accusingly and says, "That's weird. I don't have a laptop and an iPhone."

Ouch.

While his tone was light and playful, the meaning behind the words didn't change. I put everything down and asked him if perhaps we should come up with some kind of rules.

We didn't get very far because he never answered me and eventually just went back to sleep.

Now I am at a loss. There is no way that I can be done working by the time he gets home from work. Yesterday, he walked in the door, much to my surprise, at 3:00. Today, I am feeling completely overwhelmed because on top of my work stuff, other things need to be done as well. Like grocery shopping. With coupons.

There is no way I'll be done by the time he gets home at 5:00 today.

How do you balance it all? Is sleep overrated? Is there some essential element that I am missing?







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Ten Minutes of Your Life

I have a slight confession:
I had been working on this entry day-by-day. My intention was that by Saturday, it would be done, and I would set it to auto-post. However, the powers of procrastination took over. Then to be slammed with a headache on Sunday so terrible, I would have gladly taken ice picks to my eyes to relieve the pain, that meant I couldn't/wouldn't/didn't have this post finished.

I didn't even get online yesterday.

Much.

At any rate, I appreciate your taking the time to read my posts. I have also changed up the comment form so that hopefully it is easier for you. No more word verification, either.

(For now.)

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For my oh-so-revealing answers to the Question of the Day, read on:

1. If you were granted access to only one blog of your choosing, which blog would you choose and why?
-Why did I pick such a hard question?!? This took a great deal of thought. There are reasons that I read every blog that I read. Having said that, in only choosing one, I would choose:

Sophie (aka, BooMama) I just love her upbeat posts. Two things: I doubt seriously she even knows I read her. Or follow her on Twitter. Or she lives about an hour and a half from me. (That sounded slightly stalker-ish. Yikes.)

We had an email conversation once. About corn bread. Seriously.

2. What five books are, in your opinion, the best you've read to date?
Geez. Who writes these questions? They are HARD. Thought provoking even. Maybe it's just me.

1. Water For Elephants by Sara Gruen I just read this book last fall. After everyone else. I don't remember why I decided I would like it after NOT reading it for so long. I couldn't put it down. It was different than anything that I had ever read.
   
2. Emma and Me by Elizabeth Flock I had read a couple of other books by her and fell in love with her writing style. It is written from the perspective of the little girl, Carrie. Then I got to the end. I never saw it coming. Normally, I can start a new book later in the day or the next. It took me three days to recover. If you never read another book, read this one. Well done, Elizabeth.
   
3. She's Come Undone by Wally Lamb Although we had different childhoods, I related to this character in a way that I had never before. I first read it over ten years ago. I re-read it this past fall. I own a copy. No doubt I will read it again.
   
4. The Help by Kathryn Stockett This book caught my eye from the shelves at Target. I didn't purchase it -that is a rarity- but I knew I wanted to read it. Oddly enough, I thought it was about something else. I FINALLY was able to get a copy from the library late this past fall. I could not stop reading. I am hoping that she'll write another book soon. I've got my eyes on it..... Congratulations, Kathryn. Every writer hopes the first book will get published.
   
5. In Her Shoes by Jennifer Weiner You know I love me some Jennifer. There is not one of her books that I do not love. However, there was something special about this book. I just read it in early-December. I thought I knew what it was about because I had seen the movie. Come to find out, I hadn't seen the movie, or at least not enough. This book made me think. Period. And if you have seen the movie, read the book. You'll get some extra-special stuff that just makes it all the more enjoyable.
   

3. What is your favorite guilty pleasure?

Used bookstores. Seriously. I love walking in and not knowing what could be on the shelves. Last Monday, I went to a bookstore that I don't normally go to. Mostly because I can get the books cheaper at other places. However, I was looking for a specific book and I have a good amount of credit there. While I didn't find the book I wanted, I kept looking at the shelves at all the possibilities....and then I found a book that I had been wanting for at least two years. It was a hardback, so I tentatively pulled it out to check her price. It was less than she normally prices them. It became mine....Even though I had already been to the library AND Goodwill, it totally made my day to find that book.

4. You are in a store and notice a woman using a child wearing a backpack to steal various items. Would you alert a member of management? Why or why not?

I can hardly wait to hear the back lash on this one....Ok, here is my thing. I would probably do an assessment of what they are stealing. That probably sounds all judge-y and whatnot, but it really would depend:

Are they relatively well- dressed and stealing clothes? Yes
Are they not-so-well dressed and stealing clothes at say, Macy's? Yes

Are they stealing cokes, candy, and expensive meat cuts at the grocery store? Yes
Are they stealing a loaf of bread, a jar of peanut butter, and some tuna? Maybe not

Stealing is wrong, period. There are too many avenues one can take to acquire the necessities in life when one finds him or herself in difficult times. I know that some people would say things like, "I would never get food from a food pantry. That's just not my style." or "I wouldn't work at McDonald's. I know there is a better job out there."

I would have a severe panic attack if I had to ask for food to feed my children. But in times of desperate need, I would go if it meant they got fed.

As long as I am able to make money SOMEHOW legally, I don't want to work at McDonald's. But if that was the only way I could make the funds necessary to take care of my children, I would do it.

However, if all avenues had been closed to me. If the food pantry turned me away and I could not get anyone to hire me AND MY KIDS WERE HUNGRY- yes, I would steal food.

And that is why I would not tell on the lady stealing bread, peanut butter, and tuna. More than likely, I would find a way to see if I could help her out. Now if she gets nasty with me, then it's on. I am totally telling.

5.You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do?

I would say something like, "Really? That's strange. I've known "Sally" for years and that seems really out of character for her. As a matter of fact one time she (insert something GOOD here)."
Then, I would probably freak out and worry about what they say behind MY back.

6.What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What’s holding you back?

Writing a completed novel. Fear is the thing holding me back. I am scared of the rejection-actually I expect it- but rather the success.

So that's about it. I actually enjoyed these questions and reading your responses. I don't know that I'll ever do this again, but I have a few more questions should the need ever arise.

In the meantime, I suppose it's back to the rambling hit-or-miss posting you've come to expect.


Grammatical errors and all.

If you write it on Facebook, they will see it

It is 10:09 P.M. as I start this post. I should have started at 10:09 (or earlier) this morning, but as everything else in my life, those plans went awry.

Anyway, I have a lot of thoughts that I just need to get out in the open. Why I feel the need to do it in an open forum escapes me, but alas, here we are.

I totally ended that last sentence with a verb. A "to be" verb at that. It's grammatically incorrect, and I can live with it for the moment.

________________________

1. Thank you for the input on my new bloggy design. I really like it, but the colors do tend to distract me from time to time. Not that I am looking at my own front page that often, but I don't want anyone not to read because of the design. There have been blogs in the past that I wouldn't return to because I didn't like the design.

Having said that, don't be concerned if it changes....

2. Jennifer Weiner (link opens to her blog) is my hero. She is my inspiration. She is the writer I wish I was. Anyway, I follow her on Twitter. She blogs live every Monday night comments about the "Bachelor." Hilarious. She made two other comments to which I directly tweeted her a comment. While she did not respond, I secretly hoped she would. It may be good she didn't. I would have fallen over dead. And apparently Big Daddy needs my income. The sad pittance it may be....

Now that I think about it, I should probably put some sort of clause in our will stating that should I ever have the chance to communicate with Ms. Weiner, no matter the method, and I find, or rather he finds me dead, HE is NOT allowed to sue her for pain and suffering or any other manner of remuneration he may pick up on one of those judge shows.


3. Yesterday, I had the meeting with a Girl Scout Troop. I was over prepared but not nervous at all! It helped that I knew the girls from school.

Two things I learned from the meeting:
-Be cautious of any thing your post as your status on Facebook. On Saturday, I posted: "Just had a meeting with the small folks. I am resigning as "The Maid" and promoting myself to "The Queen." One of the troop leaders that also happens to be one of my friends said, "So how is being the Queen going?"

At first I was in a panic--she didn't make a comment on that post! I answered her, laughed and moved on.

(It's going well, so far.)

Later, I was passing out business cards to the girls. I told them that if they thought of questions later, they were more than welcome to email me. Even if it was about homework. One girl, whom I had taught when she was in fourth grade said, "How fast do you respond? Are you online a lot?"

I was starting to spit out, "Yes. For work, a lot of time is spent online blah blah blah..." when the other troop leader whom is also my friend on FB said rather frankly, "Yeah. She's online a lot."

Um. Yeah. Alrightly then.


4. There is a long standing argument, not in an ugly way, between Big Daddy and me. While I love that he is my number one fan, his positivity (on this particular subject) grates on my last good nerve. There is going to come a time that one of us will be the victor. Secretly, I hope I win; that means I will have met my writing goals. However, it would seem of late that HE is actually going to be wrong.

It will kill us both (strictly emotionally speaking) if he wins.

I guess we'll see.

Thanks for listening. I know this post is about as clear as mud. Which should give you a clear idea the sheer thickness of thoughts running through my mind at the moment.

An Old Gal Learns New Tricks

This past week has been a strange week for me. But in hindsight, it has actually been quite good. The dirty laundry might disagree, but we are not on speaking terms at the moment, so I don't care.

The following is a listing of things I have done for the first time this week:
(Author's note: Items are not listed in a particular order. Willy-nilly is the theme.)

• I was contacted to speak to a Girl Scout Troop about writing. This will be my very first public speaking assignment for professional reasons.
  
• Bought some materials to learn to knit, "With two sticks", as Darrin puts it. I have managed to cast-on!
  
• Went into a store to secretly shop and test customer service for a particular product. I can't really talk about this much...it has to remain a mystery. Shhh...
• Was disappointed that school was canceled four days in a row. (They were out yesterday, too, but it didn't bother me.) In the not-so-distant past, I would have whooped and hollered for the chance to sleep in.
  
• Ordered a Unanimous Decision at Moe's rather my usual Funkmeister with Sour Cream. (Sorry, Moe's. I refuse to call it an Overachiever.)
• I learned to make a button for my blog. Here are some rough drafts:

I know. I still have a long row to hoe.

• FINALLY learned what the idiom, "One in the hand is worth two in the bush," means. Thank you, Geico.
• Downloaded Gimp, Picnik, and Picasa. Picnik and Picasa are photo editing software programs that you can download for the low bargain basement price of FREE! While Picnic has more fun features and I am currently obsessed, I really like Picasa for the simple stuff.
• Stepped on the scale and then stepped off. Moved it, reset it, and stepped on it again. Cried. reached highest non-pregnant weight-ever.
  
• Picture this: Darrin is sitting behind me, I am not sure what he is doing. He asks me to spell a word. I spell, "a-l-o-u-d." He is quiet for a few minutes and then holds up a sign he made for his door. It reads, "Horses Aloud!" I never thought to ask which aloud/allowed he wanted to spell....
• Called my neighbor to borrow an ingredient needed to make meatloaf.
• Made a mock-version of Olive Garden's Chicken and Gnocchi soup. I even made the gnocchi from scratch.
• Made a recipe from this website. The next day she was was on "Good Morning America." For some reason, I felt like one of my friends was on. (Note: link will take you directly to the soup I made.)

All of this "new" stuff is on top of my regular work load. No wonder I am behind.

How was your week?

On the Menu: Crow and Humble Pie

Perhaps it is ironic.

No, that would be incorrect usage.

Is it a paradox?

Um, I am not sure.

Whatever it is, I couldn't hear the laughter for all my self-promotion and horn tootin'.

After all my talk about grammar, mechanics, and usage, this morning I got a big smack in the face. There are some areas of mechanics that I have to focus on and really think about when proofreading anything. But for the last six months, I have been reading grammar books like other people read the latest release off the Best Seller's List.

I thought that I had reviewed areas I had forgotten, learned things I never knew, and strengthened skills I was already using.

And then, the unthinkable happened.

This morning, after logging onto one of the content providers I write for, a new section calling for proofreaders opened up. I knew this element was coming, and I was excited for it. In order to be granted access, a ten-question test has to be passed with a 90% or better. Those receiving a failing grade can re-test three months from the test date.

So, I took the test.

And in three months I can try again.

In the meantime, I will be spending some time studying and taking some tests.
Interactive Online Grammar Exercises - English Grammar Connection
BBC - Skillswise - Words - Grammar
Basic Skill Practice Games
Grammar and Punctuation | The Blue Book of Grammar and Punctuation

Since I started this post, I had to go into the forum of the content site to find a link. Others started a thread stating that they had not passed the test either. Hmm...interesting.

This shall be the next-to-last time I mention the blatant misuse of someone's grammar or mechanics.

Here it goes:

As seen on a banner for a new business opening in town, "So-and-So's Thrift Shop. Now accepting ladie's clothes...."

As seen in my own bureau drawer, a returned envelope addressed to "The Manco's."

Oh yes, I did.

Learning Curve

I think we have long established the list of things that I don't do well.

I think it has also long since been established the one thing that I do do well is the fact that I CAN list the things I don't do well.

(In case you were wondering, I giggled to myself at the "do do" above. Sign # 4356 that I am the mother of boys.)

You may be surprised to learn that I am terribly shy. Like, probably-need-to-be-medicated shy.

But my shyness has a limit. In front of a classroom of kids, I am (at least in my mind) the funniest, most outgoing person you could meet. I will joke, dance, do yoga, sing a song, or stand on my head if it means that a child will learn something. But let another adult walk into the room, and my heart starts pounding, my hands get palmy, my throat gets dry, and I probably sound like a blithering idiot.

When it comes to my online presence, I am more outgoing, until it comes to how shall I say? Pimping myself out?

Sure, those that are friends with me on facebook know that I will occasionally post something that I wrote or brag about something I did, but that's about it.

Recently, I had an epiphany about this shyness. I realized that the people that are succeeding with their blogs, writing careers, referrals, or anything else that necessitates networking are well, networking.

Twitter. LinkedIn. Stumble. Facebook. Etc. and so forth.

I have been writing for six months. Hundreds of articles, newsletters, how-to advice, and web content for other people. Copyrights sold. Nothing save for six articles on the Yahoo! Contributor Network (formally Associated Content) that has my byline on it.

For the last few days, I have been stepping out of my comfort zone. Not real far. Baby steps really.

I will be successful. Or at least will have something to show. For someone to say, "Well, she tried. That's for sure."

Who knows? One day you all can say, "I knew her when no one knew her."

In case you were wondering...

Apparently, words allude me today. I am taking a break from work so that I can write the way I LIKE TO WRITE.

With humor.

In first-person.

Non-formal.

Yesterday, I wrote so much and even had a bit-o-drama to go with it, that today...

I got nothing.

*-*-*-*-*

The above text is what I mentioned in my entry earlier today.

I looked at the "I got nothing" for a few minutes and watched the blinking curser. Only to get up, go into the kitchen, decide the dishes could wait, and retreat to the couch where I spent the remainder of the afternoon watching all manner of courtroom drama.

I can neither confirm nor deny that a nap may have occured.

Today, I attempted to make-up for yesterday's transgressions, or lack thereof. I got up a 5 am. Fixed sausages and eggs. Packed healthy lunches. Cleaned the kitchen. Started laundry.

By the time the kids walked out of the door at 6:05, I was working. Of course, with any office job, one has to warm up. Fix a fresh cup of coffee. Check emails (Google reader) and chit-chat at the water cooler (Facebook).

After I wrote that compelling entry for today, I started in on writing. It was an odd assortment today. The first article was sent back because I didn't use a key phrase exactly as it was ordered. My usual method of splitting up two words that need additional punctuation or perhaps a preposition did not work.

Let's pretend the key phrase was "paper book." Obviously, the words don't flow correctly just as written. Typically, for SEO practices, this method would work:

"Most manuscripts should be written on plain, white paper. Book publishers will reject any queries that are written..."

See what I did there? But, NOOOO. I had to revise.

Anyway, I did a lot of writing today. Since I met my daily goal in a relatively short amount of time, I should have saw these things coming:

• The water meter tank thing is full of water. We can't figure out why. Upon opening the lid, it was discovered that a black widow had also taken up residence. She was none-to-keen to our siphoning out her in-ground pool.
• The internet went down this afternoon (thankfully not while I was in the middle of sending in a copy) for about an hour. It's a wonder I lasted in such primitive conditions. Plus, I was trying to figure out what to make for supper with spaghetti noodles, a pack of raisins, and coffee creamer.
• The power went out AGAIN. This is a daily annoyance occurrence. About a mile or so up the road they are building a substation that is suppose to help something or another. If it would keep the clocks on the right time, that would be a start. This daily loss of power is crazy.
  
• Big Daddy reiterated the fact that I don't have a "real" job despite the fact I have received "real" money. Of course, it is not a lot of money (see bullet point above) but it is more than I made last week and the week before that. And certainly more than the State of Tennessee thinks I am owed. He then followed up with, "I just thought you'd be making a lot more, that's all."
  
• I did not tell him that I thought I'd be thin with long thick locks. We don't always get what we want.
  
• The living room TV died. During Judge Judy no less.
• After a quick google search, I have figured out the problem(s):
  
  1. The flux- capacitor all- spark died. This is common and an easy fix. And cheap! (See above bullet points)
  2. This has happened on every model of Magnavox TV with the same model number as ours. Clearly, it's a conspiracy. I am blaming the blond on "The View."

And finally, I was nominated to be the Secretary for the band boosters. During a meeting that I didn't attend--for the second time. Because I am so good with dates.

However, tomorrow is a new day. Except the small folks will be home at noon.

Well, it's better than nothing.

[insert witty title here]

I haven't blogged.

But many entries are in my head.

I haven't written anything.

But I can't stop thinking about it.

I haven't commented on anyone's blog.

But I REALLY want to see what everyone is up to.

Having said that, I have:

• Clipped some 1,329,405 coupons.
• Filed about 999,765 of them neatly in my [new] binder.
• Fought a post-4th migraine.
• Helped Big Daddy with his new menu on a holiday weekend Weenie Wagon. Rib-eye sandwiches? To die for....
• Realized I have used a title twice. I guess I liked that one.
• Bought two squeeze bottles of mayo and a bottle of Ranch for $1.66. Coupons rule.
• Ate a $42 dollar dinner at Logan's for.....$22. Again, see above. (Four people dined.)
• Saw Toy Story 3. Totally worth every penny. And I didn't have a coupon. And yes I cried. Three times. Four if you count after the movie when BD asked if a certain part got me.

I know it doesn't sound like much, but I swear I have been going full steam. I haven't even had time to read.

I know!

Anyway, I just wanted to give a shout-out. Hope everyone had a safe and happy holiday weekend. I'll be around shortly....

I Lost on Jeopardy, Baby....Oh wait. Wrong Show

I mentioned in my last post that I auditioned for Wheel of Fortune. I thought I had blogged about it at some point, but I couldn't find any evidence if I did. I know I mentioned it a couple of other times.

Here is the nitty gritty:

Back in September of '05, the Wheel Mobile came close to where we live. It was my favorite game show, and I had always wanted to go on.

It was hot that day. And we were on a blacktop parking lot. For five hours.

They play three mock games a day. You can go in the lotto for one or all of the games. By filling out this card with pertinent info, it goes into a barrel-type thing and they pull the names for each session.

I cheered. I clapped. I hooted and hollared. I even played along (in my head) while my family sat patiently and roasted with me in the blazing sun.

I never got called.

On the cards that are filled out, you are to include an email addy. I forget the reasoning, but there is a chance you can be called when they come back for the final auditions. It was recommended that you put interesting information because you will stand out. The cards for the email drawing are all looked at.

We figured I didn't have a snowball's chance.

Late in December, ( I think) I get an email inviting me to the auditions that would be held in February.

Most of that day was blur. The only thing I really remember is going in for the second time to play a game because I had made the first cut. (Although, looking back, I am not sure how.) So, we get herded into another room and are playing the game. We are told that we are not only being judged on game play, but how we react as an audience member. No pressure, right?

I finally get a chance to play. I stand up and was supposed to pic a letter. Except all the obvious choices had been taken: R, S, T, L, N and there wasn't much up there to work with. I am was in a panic and chose a B. Nope. Have a seat, loser.

Finally, some chic that has had all the time in the world solves the puzzle (People Magazine). We were given a brief break while they made the decisions of the next cut. I didn't make it.

But, I didn't walk away empty handed! Between both times I acquired:

Two 8x10 black and white glossys of Pat and Vanna
A Wheel of Fortune ink pen that I may or may have just forgotten to return
A Wheel of Fortune pin that lights up (or did. It's broken now.)
A golf pencil that says "I tried out for Wheel of Fortune"
The satisfaction of knowing that I did something completely out of my comfort zone.

All in all it wasn't a bad experience. And if sitting in a conference room was nerve racking, I can't imagine in front of a studio audience and the blinding stage lights. It is definitely easier at home.

Like I said yesterday, if they come back, I'll try again.

Thought I was the Queen. It looks like I was the Joke(r)

I think Sara was sheer genius for saying that there should be Xanax machines at the entrance to WalMart on my last post.

I know where I'd be spending my quarters.

Today, I was thinking that perhaps one of the problems with Americans (being general here people. Don't start sending the hate mail and throwing tomatoes) is that we are spoiled. We want what we want when we want it. Yesterday is better.

Case in point:

Before we went grocery shopping yesterday, Big Daddy and I sat down and made a supper menu for the week. Or should I say the next five days because starting next Friday, I will be spending the next four days with Big Daddy at his store. In the Weenie Wagon. If ever there was a time for Xanax....
Anyway, we hadn't come up with anything Sunday and another day so he says "we'll come up with something" whilst browsing the store.

Which, I'd like to say is annoying anyway because 1) he is so picky, that I feel like I only make like six meals on a revolving basis, and 2) Hello?!? It's Saturday. Browsing is not an option.

(Don't try to figure us out. You'll only need to be medicated later.)

Long story short, nothing sounded good. I am not sure what his problem was. I'm all, "Why can't we just eat a salad and some fruit and call it a day?"

Those of you that know what my husband looks like probably would have guessed his reaction to that. Anything that is consumed without a meat, potato, and bread product is called an appetizer.

Today, I had to run to Target so he asked me to come up with something for dinner. Never mind the fact that he came from his store. Where they supposedly sell groceries.

Nothing sounds good to me other than salad and fruit, so I finally take the easy way out and grab some ground turkey to make a meatloaf.

I get home and he says, "Well. Okay. But that doesn't really sound good."

Someone dial the number for Oxygen. If they hurry they can film actual footage for next season's "Snapped."

After looking at the paltry selections that we studied yesterday, His Majesty decides that chicken salad in a pita, cantaloupe, strawberries, and chips sound good. Now, I could have come up with this menu YESTERDAY had he not specifically said, "I don't know what I want to have on Sunday, but I just know that I want to get back to the "traditional" Sunday dinners you were making before you were working.

So, I leave AGAIN and run to Kroger. There were about nine million people in there. And of course they were all getting the same things I was. Probably due to the fact it was about 95 degrees today.


Now that I am "unemployed", I have decided that for the rest of the summer, things will go like this:

1. Big Daddy won't be accompanying me to the store. I will be going during the weekday. This means that I'll have to take the boys, but that's fine. I can tell them "no" and even punish them if they get out of line.

2. I will be resuming my role of Queen and will serve what I want on the night I want. Special requests will have to be submitted in writing at least a month in advance.

3. Big Daddy will not starve if he doesn't like what I serve. He was cooking long before I came along, and as a matter of fact, he is actually a better cook than I am.

4. Maybe I should rethink this role of Queen....

5. I am going to find out how that woman Jenn mentioned got $150 for $1.

6. Moving to Germany with Sara may be worth considering.

How NOT to have your photos taken

Our 7:30 appointment shows up fifteen minutes early. We are excited because we close the studio at 8:00. The 7:15 is just finishing up. In my mind, I am planning my trip home...

As I start the session planning, I ask her who all is going to be in the photos....

"You are going to hate me! ::gigglegigglegiggle There is a 7-year old, a 3-year old, and a 2-month old. Plus we want to change their clothes four times. But we want to start with Christmas, them all together....."

This goes on for what seemed like ten minutes while I am feverishly scribbling something legible on the paper.

Flash forward through a screaming fit (three year old), a good old fashion cry (2-month old), much bribing with Skittles, McDonald's, and a train set (to the three year old by the mother) the father walking out after being told that he was absolutely no help ( I think he may have been sneaking some adult beverages and we shouldn't blame him) and nearly pulling the black backdrop off the track (the 3 year old again) and over an hour shooting time....

-One good shot of the group (Christmas)
-Three good shots of the seven year old (in three different outfits)
-One good shot of the seven and three year old (Christmas)
-One good shot of the seven and three year old (matching polos)
-Three good shots of the baby nekkid (profile, mother and baby, baby feets and mom's hand)
-One good shot of the baby (Christmas)
-Three shots of the three year old pouting in various outfits

The moral of this story:

If you don't feed your child prior to a 7:30 photo shoot, you will get what you get. My magic wand is in the shop. Futhermore, if you use bribery to get what you want from said three year old, even he will know that "one more time" means nothing. Especially with a pocketful of Skittles.

She puts the $ in "Sale"

I hope that everyone had a happy, safe Thanksgiving weekend. We just had a quiet dinner with the five of us and my parents. There may or may not been a bit-o-drama that may or may not have been my fault. Jessica's boyfriend dropped by after we ate. The dogs tried to bite him.

He may have learned to keep his feelings about Michigan internal. At least when the dogs are in the room.

Being that both my mom and I work second jobs, this year we had to forgo the annual 4am trek to get the one item on everyone's list. As much as I hate going out into the crowd, I sort of missed it for some reason.

But I didn't realize my feelings until after I woke up at 7:30ish and was able to leisurely drink my coffee.
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So, the last you read, my second job involved serving country fresh breakfast or dinner. Well,
the move to the cash stand didn't work out so much. I was put on a "medical leave" which I may have taken the wrong way. I chose to find another avenue for revenue.

I am once again a "professional photographer."

Sure, at this time of year the stress is unbelievable, but it is different than making sure table 111 has their drinks, I put the order in for table 121, table 131 needs ketchup, the food for table 141 is up, and someone asked for something.....

::breathe::

Anyway, I have always missed the years I spent taking pictures. I was excited to go back. Until.

Isn't there always an until?

Times have changed in the six years I have been out of the biz. Mostly, the company I work for still wants and expects creative, top-notch photography.

(FYI, the company to which I am referring to starts with an S and ends in ears.)

It used to be that if you took phenomenal pictures, they would sell themselves. Today, it seems to be that it doesn't matter what shots you take, if you present the collections in the right way, folks will buy them. At least that is what our district manager who has never been a photographer and was hired when Hollywood Video went out of business would have us to believe.

Everything has turned into a numbers game. I decided that I would use my creativity and hope that would be enough to keep me in a job. I don't like the selling part, but it is essential and necessary. Or so it seems.

So, I have done my best work. I put on my big girl panties and accepted that sales was the task at hand.

On Saturday, our district manager decided to make an appearance. We were only booked every fifteen minutes, so that shouldn't be a problem, right?

::insert nervous laughter here::

He comes in and the place is packed, of course. I am finishing up a set and someone else is bringing the next group to be shot in. Things are going well.

Then, we fell behind. First it was thirty minutes, then it was an hour. He. Was. Not. Helping.

Lo and behold, the bottom fell out. He looked at our numbers for the last four weeks and it would seem that I have the highest sale per sitting in our studio. He congratulated me. Shook my hand even.

I tried to say that it wasn't fair to compare my sittings against the manager because she has twice as many sits as I do. His reply, "It doesn't matter. And the others are right in line with you and are way behind. Thank you for doing such a great job!"

Come to find out, he thinks that one person should stay in the camera room, and I should stay at the sales table. "She knows how to make the sale"

I don't think so.

See, if he'd listen to us, he'd understand that we sell the sitting we photographed. It's not my "technique" that is opening their pocketbooks. People don't buy photos because someone is running numbers like a car salesman. He looked at all of our pictures, so I am not sure when he got confused.

The next time you are at a studio to get photographs taken, don't get upset when s/he starts out with their top collection and it's $379.

Someone with a background other than photography has told them that pictures don't make money, words do.

I won't be changing careers anytime soon.

If I ever had aspirations of having a billion followers and thousands of comments a day, I have pretty much shot that down, right?

I am waiting to make sure I am not going to get called into work before I get busy. I was reading another blog and got all inspired to write a post of my own.

A mish-mash of catching up, if you will.

Life has been okay as of late. And by okay, I mean Big Daddy and I still have jobs, there is food in the pantry, the kids are healthy, and we haven't foreclosed on our house.

Can't ask for much more, can we?

Actually, Big Daddy got a promotion at work. But before you send cards, congratulations, and flowers, you should know that he does the exact same thing he did, for oh, about $20 more a week. Plus he has been working seven days a week! On salary!

The kids are all doing wonderfully at the moment. Nicholas was invited to be in the Beta Club this year. He was so cute looking at the brochure. His selling point that he wanted to do it was, "..And I can apply for $235,000 in college scholarships!"

Please note, he is in the fifth grade.

We just need to get Darrin's grades up, ONE LETTER GRADE, in one subject, and he can be invited next year. I think it would be awesome! That would mean, me and all of my kids are in some sort of Beta Club. :::beams with pride:::

Speaking of Beta stuff (Fiona-please turn away), I guess I shouldn't be bragging....I have been the worst college student this semester. I can't get in the zone. I wait until the last minute to get projects done. I might crack a book before a test. And this semester is the lightest load I have taken so far--seven hours. I need to get my poop in a group before next fall. Actually, before February. I have transcripts and scholarships to gather up, an exit exam and Praxis test to take. Oh, and I should probably turn in my Intent to Graduate....

I would like to say that my lack of enthusiasm is because I am working two jobs. But that sounds like a lame excuse. It's all I've got, though.

That is about all that is going around La Costa Lotta.

I promise my next entry won't be another month from now.

(The phone never rang--I guess I am off this morning. Whoot!)

I can scratch this off my to-do list.

I have to study for a timed, online Biology test that opens tomorrow. I have to take an online, timed quiz for Speech. I have to write my speech that will be presented on Monday. There are approximately 87 loads of laundry waiting to take a vacation downstairs.

I am watching the second airing of Desperate Housewives of Atlanta while I write this post.

It's all about priorities, right?

When I last wrote, the kids had the flu. I will save some time and just let you know that it was the beginning of the end that still hasn't gotten here yet.

However, ( that is a fancy but) it seems as though word has gotten around locally about my little blog.

Of course, it could be the fact that I announced it, more than once, in Speech yesterday.

One of my classmates is also a co-worker, and she asked me today for the address.

(Hey, Chelsey!)

I told her, "Well, I'll give it to you, but I haven't written in like a month."

She responded with, "Then I suggest you write something soon."

Alrighty, then.

I would also like to give a shout-out and thanks to those of you that emailed wondering if I was ok. It means more than you know.

Writing as of late seems to have been reduced to Facebook status updates, and even those are sporadic at best. I am going to make a better effort to post more often, and more importantly, comment on YOUR blogs.

Just got to get my priorities in order.

Insert witty and relevant title here

Many things on the agenda tonight:

1. The pantry/ laundry room is basically finished. The only thing it lacks is paint. Big Daddy built a new crate for the dogs, built in two drawers that were left over from a previous project, ect ect ect. The only thing is that right now it is all ghetto fabulous and needs paint. But apparently Lowe's has a policy that you must pay for things. Must be some crazy capitalist scheme. And no, there will no pictures for a while. At least until we can get it all painted. You'd think with the 927 cans in the garage, we could paint a 12x12 room and some exposed wood.

2. Today was registration day at school. President and I made survival kits to give to all the teachers and staff, and the students when the parents signed up for PTO. You can figure out what was inside the sack from what I wrote on the outside:

Here is you SURVIVAL kit:
A lollipop to help you lick your problems.
A sponge to soak up your knowledge.
A tootsie roll to help you roll with the punches.
An eraser so each day you can start with a clean slate.
A paper clip to hold everything together.
A pencil to write your wrongs.
A cotton ball for when you can hear yourself think.
Smarties...they are the seeds of learning.
And a star burst to remind you...YOU are the STAR!
Welcome back to school. We are happy you are here.

Speaking of, I made a blog for our PTO to keep the parents up to date with the goings on. So far it has been well recieved by those who know about it. I am sort of excited although no one knows its me, per se. Now if I could major in Farm Town/Facebook, I'd be set.

3. I noticed after I did the last entry, I only had five items. If that doesn't prove that I preoccupied with WAY too many things, I don't know what would.

4. One teacher is only taking the first four weeks off of school. At first, I was supposed to get it. Cha-ching! We get a raise and now solid work? Yes, please! However, due to some technical issue, another substitute got it because she has her license.

You all might as well be warned now; when I graduate and get my license, you will be so tired of hearing about it, I am sure you'll quit reading. That piece of paper apparently is magical and is the key that unlocks the universe.

Meeting ajourned.

I am not sure why I am tired

Today in the life of me:

5:00am Alarm goes off. Big Daddy hits the snooze.

5:09am See above.

5:18am Ditto.

5:27am I manage to get up, potty, make coffee, and feed the cat.

5:33am Eat breakfast and check email.

5:47am Get first cup of coffee

6:00am Wash hair so it will start to dry before I have to get ready.

6:10-6:35am Make lunches, breakfast,and iron clothes.

6:35-7:00am Make-up, hair, dress. Answer knocks at the door THREE times.

7:00-7:05 Decide whether my new Old Navy flip-flops look ok.

7:06 Head out the door

7:16-8:00 Prepare for the day in a room nearly the temperature of the surface of the Sun. (Which is 5,800 K in case you were wondering.)

8:00-3:25 goodmorninghowareyou?youneedtogetstarted?thereisnotalking
doyouhaveanylunchmoney?
getoutyourreadingbookidontknowhenwe
aregoingtodothatyesitisduetodaygetoutyourstory
listenstoptalkingyesyoucango
::gradepapersfilepapers::
getoutyourmathbooks
(and so on and so forth)

:breathe::

3:30-4:30 Prepare the inferno for the sub tomorrow. Finally go home.

4:40-7:00 help with homework. Grade three sets of papers. Do astronomy homework. Talk to Big Daddy on the phone. Make dinner. Sign papers. Sign agendas. Drink about seven gallons of water to combat the dehydration.

7:00-9:00 Watch Biggest Loser and resist temptation to eat cookies.

9:10 Break down and eat a cookie. (or two.)

9:15-9:30 Talk to Big Daddy again.

9:32 Grab Lit homework to complete take home test.

9:33 Pick up laptop and type "blogger" in the search box.

.
.
.
.


How was your day?

Maybe this won't be on my permanent record

Big Daddy and I have a philosophy when it comes to people and their professions. I don't want to accidentally offend anyone and it certainly doesn't apply to everyone so I won't give examples.

Could I be anymore vague? (Channeling Chandler from "Friends")


Nicholas drives me crazy on a daily basis when it comes to his homework. Now, this kid is in the fourth grade. The routine has been set since he was in Kindergarten, and HELLO! he is not the oldest child.

The afternoon goes: come in, get homework out, grab snack and drink, go potty as needed, commence with homework until complete, get agenda signed put away backpack.

There is no variance. It is the same. Every. Day.

This kid can't get it through his head to just sit down and get his stuff done. He HATES (and I am using the full-fledged, emphasis on the word 'hate') math. He will puff and huff, groan and belly-ache until bedtime.

It's ALWAYS something with this kid.

(And for the record...we just got phase-two sent home today. He is being tested for giftedness. So it's not like the kid doesn't get it. He totally does. Tested ABOVE average last year.)

Just tonight it was a belly-ache. Then it was a headache AND belly-ache. And not ten minutes ago he was saying that the laundry soap was making him sick. (I have the washer going, of course.)


This goes on at least once a week. It is ridiculous. He has a reward waiting if he'd JUST GET IT DONE. Big Daddy was off today and bought some stuff to plant in the yard.

(Please don't ask me what they are. All I know is pink, red, green and viney).


Tomorrow I go in for my first day of MY fourth grade class (today I had a sub--oh the irony!) and can you imagine if they ALL had a belly-ache/headache/soap smells too much/ or whatever stall tactics they could think up?

I can lead 24 other 10-year olds, but am lost on my own....

Having a TON of fun

Yesterday at school, the kids had a field day of sorts to celebrate the end of the TCAP tests.
It was awesome. Last year, our previous principal would have expected business-as-usual.

Anyway, I was in third grade and when it was our grade level's turn for kickball, I took the girls and had our own game and the boys played with the gym teacher. I played for both teams and did the pitching. Towards the end, they thought it would be fun if I kicked and they tried to get me out.

I made a run and got out once.

And today, I am feeling it. How sad is that?

I'd better get in shape or I'll end up like the other SEVEN teachers that sat on the hill and watched me have fun with their kids. They don't know what they missed. We even had a couple of rogue boys try and get in our super-cool and fun game.

Now that I think about it, one of those teachers had a camera.

Hmmm....

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In case you are interested, I have a new post up at Making a Mommy. A list of sorts...